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The Spiritual Feminist

Blog

Things To Say NO To In 2022

April 8, 2022

because who has got time for *that*?

I will admit I have opened blogposts with a more positive title in the past, but sometimes it just *has* to be done. 

Because sister, there’s a big chance your energy is leaking all over the place to people, things, situations, you-name-it, which are not even worthy of your attention and time, let alone your spiritual growth.

Oofff, let’s sit with that for a minute.

What are you currently saying YES to that secretly kinda deserve a big fat NO? 

As much as I like to preach that we have an infinite Universe with Energy galore, the same cannot be said for our own physical energy levels (or emotional / mental capacity, for that matter).
The limit *does* exist (extra points if you get the reference) when it comes to how much you can carry, do and soak up in this world. 
And honestly, it’d be a damn shame if energy that you’d rather spent on yourself, your Self, your spiritual journey, your self development… is leaking towards stuff that you actually don’t really care about. 

So let’s lean into what we can say no to this year – for our own inner empowerment and to invite in that unbound, badass energy that we’re all so ready for here. 
You ready? 

1. Let’s say no to toxic conversation (and the people who start it). 
No one is a saint – we all gossip from time to time. However, IMO, a true spiritual life is lived from a place of open mind, open heart. You receive what you send out. If you’re continuously talking about other people, just take a guess what message that sends to the Universe about your frequency and self belief. 
Now my bet is that you know this already, but sometimes we can have those people in our lives who continue with the toxicity even if we have long left it (or are trying to).
Prioritise your boundaries. Change the conversation. Invite others to lean into positivity and inclusivity too. And if they don’t get it? Then it may need to be time to search for some enlightening conversation elsewhere… Your energy will thank you for it. 

2. Let’s say no to doubt. 
Doubt is something we have acquired. As little children, we very often don’t doubt our ability to learn something, to do something, to feel something. We are conditioned to doubt ourselves, our worthiness and abilities through media and other societal frameworks. And the worst? Sometimes we even have people around us reiterating that internalised doubt to us. 
Stay far away from people asking you ‘Are you sure …. ?’ ‘Should you really be dreaming that…?’ ‘But isn’t it a big risk to….?’. 
Okay, maybe staying away is a bit much, but become very aware of other people projecting their internalisations on you. 
Whenever you feel a doubt coming up or someone is mirroring this to you, see how it feels to lean into the opposite. What if it wasn’t risky but expansive, successful even? What if that dream is EXACTLY the right thing to be dreaming right now? Say no to doubt, say yes to hope, self belief, trust and expansion. 

3. Let’s say no to shame. 
Almost the same goes for shame. So many of us carry the heavy burden of shame around, which truly isn’t ours to carry. The judgment of others and the belief that what we think/what we dream of/what we think about/what we would like to wear/etc. are crippling us into staying small, obedient and VERY uninspired. 
‘Tis the season to say f$ck no to our internalised good girl (see ya, byeeee) and bust through the myth that we should be ashamed of who we truly are. Your light is meant to shine in this world, sister. Go and fire up that torch. 

4. Let’s say no to social pressures. 
A day full of family here. An evening full of drinking with old school pals there. Are you feeling the resistance in your body too? 
What if we get to ditch all those expectations to be social and we CHOOSE what we want to attend and what not? 
Sure, that brings us back to the judgment piece, but is that truly our problem? 
Prioritising other people’s expectations above our own energy levels sends a signal to our system that we should always just keep going on and on and on… meaning that we will never feel fully rested, never fully safe to root down and rest, because it’s on to the next thing we go… 

So prioritise antisocial times with yourself and get picky about the dates in the calendar you do have. You’ll have more energy for the socialising you choose, and your nervous system will get the time to take a breath inbetween. Not a bad deal, right? 

5. Let’s say no to limiting words & phrases 

This brings me back to all of the above. Get curious about how many times around you, in casual conversation, people’s (subconscious) limiting beliefs are woven through what they say. ‘We spent a lot of money on that thing’. ‘This opportunity will not come again’. ‘I’m not good enough for that training yet’. Recognise the sentiment? Everything people are saying about themselves is a reflection of their subconscious beliefs, and if you, in the conversation, unknowingly soak this up to be THE truth (because most likely, your mind will find a reason to agree with said person), you may leave feeling like you’ve taken three steps back on your empowerment journey. 

NO sister, that’s not what we’re about. 
And whilst you may not immediately question someone explicitly on their beliefs (everyone is on their own path, after all), visualise as you’re in conversation that you’re symbolically taking a step back and rebutting the belief for yourself. What do YOU believe to be true? What would you like to believe to be true? Go with that, run with the expansion, and continue to inspire yourself above all else. 

The key here is to prioritise your own ‘no’s’ and ‘yesses’ and trust that even though that may (probably will) cause friction with your external world, you will also inspire others deeply to explore their own truth. This is not always a process you see, neither is it one you need to consciously instigate. 
Prioritise saying no so in effect you’re saying a deep, deep yes to yourself over and over again. 
And trust that this will cause an exciting ripple effect of positive growth. Who knew a short, rather negative term could cause such expansion and opportunity? Let’s say no a few more times – it’s good for the soul. 

 

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